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Saturday, September 20, 2014

Corset Polka Dress & Give Me Love

Lucky you, I went into town today, so I dressed up. Which means you get a weekend outfit!



 I adore this dress so much.
When I first bid on it, I was scared because a) I didn't know if I'd like the polka dots, b)
the torso measurements were odd, and c) tag was petite small and I didn't know my precise bust size. Plus, the model for the dress looked super skinny and the dress seemed tight on her. I may be skinny, but I'm not that skinny. Turns out it fits just right, though it smooshes my boobs and has a corset-close torso. I'm glad now my boobs are pathetically small, because if they weren't? Lordy.
I can't speak for if I gain ten pounds.


I had another photo shoot from my photography class, and I took nigh on 40 pictures around town. It was so much fun, and I would have taken another 40 pics if I'd had enough film. I went to farms and cemeteries, and music stores and parks. It was so much fun, and a beautiful day to boot. The sky and autumn leaves were so vibrant. Gorgeous! It would have made sense to take my outfit pics out there, but I forgot to bring my digital cam and only had my film cam, which I needed reserved for class. 






I had to work concession stand at the homecoming dance for Key Club. I like it better that way because I can enjoy the music and lights and girls on their dates' arms without having to be on the dance floor. My hands got sticky from making drinks, but I got a free drink and to prove to underclassmen that not all seniors are pretentious, sanctimonious assholes. Afterward I went to Wal-Mart for groceries--I swear to you, shopping is best done at night to avoid lines, traffic and crowds. 

 As you can see, same dress/different accessories.

 My friend went to the dance with her date, and it bothers me a little. Mostly because, as benign as she is, she's a player and doesn't even see it. She's been with (not physically, mind) so many guys. There's nothing wrong with crushes, but it seems like she acts on all of them, and they almost all go sour--a few bad splits can be blamed on the guy, but a dozen over years? It doesn't look like the boys are the problem anymore. She hurts so many of them, and I know she doesn't mean to, but the road to perdition is paved with good intentions. I know this is high school and those boys will get over her, but this is a pattern that will follow her into adulthood. One day, she may break a man's heart and he might break her neck. She's enamored with boys, or maybe just love. She loves to be admired and have fun with them, but can't handle the commitment--I think it scares her. Myself, I've had enough crushes in my life to count on ten fingers, and I've acted on perhaps a couple of those. I'm pretty content to live vicariously through her. But... It makes me want to be very careful with who I give my love to. I don't want to be hurt... but I don't want to hurt anyone. 
I don't want it to seem like I'm talking trash. She's one of my best friends and I love her dearly, but my affection for her is not blind. 

My philosophy pics are back!





Here's a vid I found when I was a dorky twelve year old.
"How to kiss."


I'm in such a good mood that I've decided to post some Ed Sheeran.
Now, we all know Ed Sheeran, namely for "A Team." He's such a wonderful musician, so heartfelt. I love so many of his songs, like "Autumn Leaves," "Small Bump," "I See Fire," dude? I can keep going. But the first one I heard that had me thunderstruck was "Give Me Love." It wasn't just the song, but the music video. It made me think of Mark Zusak's The Book Thief, which is told from Death's POV, as if it were a person and not an emotion. The music video felt like it was from Love's POV. It also made me think of City of Angels (which by the way is a beautiful movie of an angel that falls in love with a woman and becomes human for her). It made me think of this; Love, who is like cupid, has to abide by rules. But Love witnesses so many people who never find love, and so Love says 'fuck it' and shoots its arrows at everyone, making people fall in love when they shouldn't, star crossed lovers, homosexual couples and biracial couples, but then Love wants to feel love for itself, so it shoots itself, and instead only dies. 


~Ash

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